Smothered By Christmas
by Colby'sGirl19
Summary: It's Charlie and Ian's first Christmas together as a family but with Ian being so resistant towards the holidays; will Christmas day go according to Charlie's plans? Or will it be a blue, blue Christmas this year? This is a one shot fic that explores the meaning of Christmas and the different traditions people have. Merry Christmas! From Colby'sGirl19. X


**Smothered By Christmas:**

_*Disclaimer - This is a one shot fic that is NOT a sequel to 'Smothered by Love' but does contain some aspects and Character plots. You do not need to have read 'Smothered by Love to read this fic nor does it contain spoilers.* __Thank you and enjoy. X Cobly'sGirl19_

_*Disclaimer-This Fic contains a _SLASH_ pairing that's _NON_-explicit. Don't like? Don't read.* Thank you and enjoy. X Cobly'sGirl19_

**1 Holiday, 2 Brothers**

**3 Families, 4 Dead.**

***Christmas Eve***

_"Thanks for running. It lets us know who's guilty." – Special Agent Colby Granger: Season 5, Episode 7: Charlie Don't Surf_

"Twas the night before Christmas, when all through the shooting range, not a creature was stirring, not even a mouse..."

"What?" Special agent Ian Edgerton looked up from where he was lying, more than a little confused.

"You forgot to turn the target on," Agent Oliver Burnett, the most recent addition to Ian's team, grinned as he pointed out to the silent and target-less field before them.

"Oh," Ian replied slowly as he looked out at the space he had previously been staring into. "What are you doing here Ollie? I thought you were on a flight to Phoenix…"

"I was meant to be," Oliver smiled cordially as he took the sniper rifle from his shoulder and rested the butt on the ground between his biker boots. "Freak snow storm grounded all the flights."

"Charlie will be disappointed," Ian smiled fondly as he pushed himself up into a sitting position and gestured for the young agent to join him on the neighbouring mat. "He was really hoping it would snow here."

"He might have mentioned something about that. You know…once or twice," Ollie smiled warmly, his eyes crinkling in the corners as he took a seat.

"Sorry," Ian shook his head despairingly as he remembered how he had come home from the office the other day to find Charlie's old craftsman home transformed into a mini grotto, bursting at the seams with Christmas cheer and in your face joy. For some reason Ian had always failed to get excited about glittering baubles and twinkling lights. Unlike Charlie who seemed to find a new inch of the house to decorate practically every second. Ian just didn't have the heart to tell Charlie that he really wasn't feeling festive in the least. '_Fake it till you make it', _that was his motto this Christmas as he scrambled just to make it through the holiday in one piece and more importantly…without disappointing Charlie. "He gets a tad excited about Christmas."

"It's nice," Ollie smiled understandably as he placed the rifle across his crossed legs and rested his elbows on his knees. "My mother is the same. Right now she's probably roasting the turkey whilst the gingerbread Santa's cool on the racks and my aunt will be pouring the eggnog as my little sisters and cousins dance to the Christmas CD they whip out every year…"

"Sounds nice," Ian smiled but really, deep down inside he felt sad. Why couldn't he get excited about Christmas like that? Everyone else had all these epic family orientated traditions and Ian? He had traditions, just not ones that involved turkey and all the trimmings…

"Why am I not convinced?" Oliver frowned interestedly, like Ian was a riddle or a puzzle that needed solving. "You've been miserable and grouchy all month. Nikki even joked that it was like you were acting as if the Grinch had beaten you to all the presents in Whoville! Do you really hate Christmas that much?"

"I don't hate Christmas," Ian sighed reluctantly as he looked away sadly, his face shadowed by grief. "It just means different things to you than it does to me…"

"Is that why you're here and not back at Charlie's with your family?" Ollie raised an inquisitive eyebrow.

"I told Charlie I needed to take a walk…" Ian grimaced as he remembered the forced smile on Charlie's lips as he had told Ian to hurry back…that had been over an hour ago. He had just felt so…smothered by all the laughter and the happiness. God…what was wrong with him?!

"What about Charlie? Didn't he have a whole Christmas Eve extravaganza planned for the two of you?"

"I wouldn't say extravaganza…" Ian growled guiltily as he looked around the empty shooting gallery.

"Charlie did," Oliver replied disapprovingly, twisting the knife a little deeper as he followed Ian's line of sight to the target that was waiting off to one side to be set in motion, someone had plastered a picture of Santa to the front. "He told me all about how Robin's family and your father were coming over and it was going to be your first Christmas together as a family…"

"I know…"

"Look…I get that the holidays and family can get to be a bit much sometimes…can I just give you a friendly piece of advice?"

"Ok…" Ian replied slowly, unsure if he really wanted to hear what the young agent had to say.

"You say Christmas means something different to you and yet rather than be honest with Charlie about how you're feeling…you ran away and are now currently hiding in a dingy FBI practice range…alone…while your family celebrates Christmas eve without you…"

"Waiting for the advice bit…" Ian replied grouchily as Oliver smiled knowingly from the mat opposite.

"My advice is to tell him. Let him in. Show Charlie if you have to…just…I don't know…don't spend the holidays alone if you don't have to. Take it from me…we all take family for granted. They're just always there…until they aren't." This time it was Oliver's face to crumple from the weight of a grief so overwhelming that Ian could have sworn that the young, fresh from the academy, agent opposite him was a seasoned veteran.

"Who'd you lose?"

"My father…lung cancer…untreatable…"Ollie forced past his choked up throat as a small tear edged its way out of the corner of his eye before he could stop it.

"I'm sorry," Ian whispered roughly as the man opposite crumbled to tears before him and felt helpless in the wake of the other man's misery. "How long ago?"

"Six months ago…this will be the first Christmas without him…and now I'm stuck in LA…so I guess I'm saying I'm envious of you sir." Ollie replied soberly as his back straightened and he transformed from the easy going boy who had first showed up, to someone that had just remembered he was technically having a breakdown in front of his boss.

"It's ok," Ian smiled as he picked up his rifle and used it to help him stand. Ollie had only joined the team four months ago as a replacement for agent William Chase, who had left for DC not long after the trial for the LA Child Snatcher was over and it was almost like Ollie had always been there. He was a laid back, easy going guy who despite being young and green had a good head on his shoulders. Ian liked him and he knew the team felt the same, which was why he knew Charlie wouldn't mind if Ian was to return with a stray agent in need of a family for the holidays. "Come on," Ian gestured as Oliver looked up confused. "What?" Ian asked defensively as Ollie took the hand Ian held out for him and pulled himself up. "You thought I'd really leave you here alone?"

"What about the others?"

"Trust me, Charlie would kill me if I didn't offer," Ian laughed as the started to head over to the shooting gallery's side exit. "One thing though," Ian stopped Ollie with his words before swivelling back around and bringing the rifle to his shoulder in one swift motion popped a round off squarely between the eyes of the Santa that had been plastered on the front of the target.

"Scrooge," Ollie laughed as Ian grinned openly for the first time that night. What could he say? He was a sniper born and breed and he couldn't have denied himself the opportunity if he'd tried!

***Christmas Day***

_*"Never been in combat, but I've been in my share of fire fights and you know what scares the hell out of me? It's not dyin'; it's letting my guys down." – Special Agent Don Eppes: Season 3, Episode 4: The Mole*_

"Charlie?" Ian whispered huskily into Charlie's ear as he came up from behind and swivelled Charlie around until he had him pinned against the counter. "I'm sorry…"

"Ian? What's going on?" Charlie asked confused as he took in the formal special forces uniform that Ian was wearing disbelievingly but with a hint of appreciation. "I woke up and you were gone…I was worried about you!"

"It's ok," Ian smiled reassuringly; a strange calm had settled over him ever since he had gone back to his loft and collected his uniform. This was his tradition and Ollie had been right the night before, Ian desperately wanted to include Charlie in this. There was a time when Charlie had argued that it was impossible to get to know Ian as half his life was classified, but he could share this…he needed to share this. "I've been hard to put up with lately haven't I?" Ian asked as he smiled sadly at the still bewildered Charlie who was dressed ridiculously in a festive jumper with a giant Christmas pudding on the front. "I know that I've been…difficult but you asked me what Christmas day meant to me…"

"It's ok Ian…it was too much pressure…" Charlie looked down sadly at the turkey baster in his hands and tried to find the appropriate response. Ian wasn't usually so forthcoming and he was curious to see where it would lead…

"I'm not a poetic or sensitive guy…you know this about me…I find it hard to talk about certain aspects of my past and not just because most of it's classified…"

"What are you saying Ian?"

"I'm saying grab your coat."

"…But the turkey!"

"Your dad is going to look after it till we come back."

"Where are we going?" Charlie asked confused as Ian took the turkey baster from Charlie's hands and placed it on the counter behind him, kissing his cheek briefly as he did so.

"You'll see," Ian replied cryptically as he took Charlie's hand in his and lead him from the large kitchen and through the living and dining area to his dad's Humvee, which he had left with the engine was still running.

*Later That Same Morning,

Los Angeles National Cemetery*

As the sun continued to slowly rise and the shadows grew that little bit shorter, Charlie looked out upon the large cemetery as the sun's rays shone off the tops of the polished white gravestones, blinding and humbling him in the same breath, as he tried desperately to make sense of the last couple of hours. Ian had said nothing on the short journey over except to explain that they were on the way to a Christmas service held in memory of fallen soldiers for the benefit of their families. Ian had performed in the ceremony by firing off a couple of rounds with eleven other similarly dressed men.

Strangely, for a non-believer such as Charlie, the service was oddly beautiful, poetic; sensitive…everything Ian had claimed not to be before coming here and as Charlie looked out upon the symmetrical and well groomed cemetery, he couldn't help but feel an odd sense of peace fall over him.

"Breath-taking…isn't it," Ian smiled as he held out two Christmas wreathes for Charlie to carry before gesturing at him to follow him down the narrow ally of graves to four unmarked ones. "It shouldn't be…and yet it is."

"I don't understand," Charlie told Ian honestly as Ian knelt down and proceeded to murmur something under his breath before laying the Christmas wreath so that it sat propped up against the cleanly cut stone. Staying off to one side, Charlie watched as Ian did the same for each grave before getting up and moving back over to Charlie's side.

"This is what Christmas means to me," Ian smiled as he took Charlie's hand in his and gave it a rough kiss. "When I was in foster care…well let's say Christmas was not a holiday I ever celebrated. Then when Kevin adopted me and we moved back here to LA…well he re-joined the marines and was posted off on assignment by the time Christmas rolled around."

"You've never had a proper Christmas?" Charlie asked bewildered as Ian shrugged off his shock with unconcerned indifference.

"When you don't know any better…what is there to miss?"

"But…but…"

"Charlie, the only times I've ever celebrated Christmas was when I was stationed over in Afghanistan and the boys made me."

"What never?"

"No…I've just never really gotten the concept of a big Christmas…I like small and intimate."

"So everything I've done…the way I kept pushing you to participate…I really ruined your first official Christmas…didn't I!"

"No Charlie….you want to know the worst Christmas I ever had? We were clearing the streets of Kabul on Christmas day when our team was attacked…"

"Your men?" Charlie pointed miscomprehending at the four unmarked graves.

"No…my team was fine. It was the team we were working with…they told us to stay back while they cleared the area of mines…they were trapped out there on the mine field…I still don't know if it was a mine or the enemy…but the other team were all blown to smithereens. The creator was so deep that you had to climb the sides a little just to get back out."

"…Did anyone survive?"

"No. All that was left was bits and pieces…but it was hard to distinguish who was who…there were no tags and we had only known code names at the time. I'm sure they were later identified…but I never found out. So now every Christmas I come here. There's no one to mourn these soldiers…and I hate to think that they've been forgotten…that perhaps their fate was never told to their families so every year I come and I place a Christmas wreath against their gravestones to let them know that they aren't forgotten…that their sacrifice is remembered…to thank them for their service. It's a stupid Christmas tradition…but it's mine."

"No, it's a wonderful tradition!" Charlie replied as his eyes shone with unshed tears.

"We should get back to yours," Ian smiled warmly as he stroked Charlie's cheek affectionately.

"We can stay longer if you need?" Charlie replied, turning his head so that he could kiss Ian's palm.

"No," Ian grinned relieved that Charlie had gotten it…Ian hated to admit it but he had been a little worried Charlie wouldn't…his world was still so innocent and pure in comparison. It was why Ian hated to talk about his war days with Charlie…the things Ian had done…the things he had witnessed! The sacrifices that were still going on…

"If you're sure," Charlie bit his lip uncertain of how to respond when Ian's face was as clouded and tortured as it was now.

"You've planned an epic Christmas Extravaganza, my first you know!" Ian shook himself out of his funk before he could truly sink in this year and kissed his boyfriend affectionately on the lips. "I think we should get back and enjoy it!" Ian grinned as he took Charlie's hand in his larger one and once more lead him to his father's car. Who knew…maybe there was a little Christmas magic to be had this year? Ian just knew that he was determined to give Christmas a go either way…for Charlie's sake. After all if there was any magic to be found, Christmas was the perfect time to try and find it!

_Fake it till you make it_, Ian laughed internally as he flashed Charlie a secretive smile. There was still the matter of exchanging presents and he was excited to give Charlie his, even if he was generally opposed to Charismas!

*Later that Night,

AT The Old Craftsman Home*

"Well I'm stuffed!" Dr Larry Fleinhardt grinned as he leaned back in his seat and patted his slightly protruding belly with satisfaction.

"Yes," Ian laughed agreeably as he looked around the large dining table at friends and family alike, all were dressed warmly in festive attire with paper hats from crackers adorning their mussed heads as the table before them looked on suitably empty. "A toast," Ian grinned as he raised his third glass of champagne out. "To Charlie, for without you…none of us would be here enjoying the best Christmas dinner…to Charlie."

"To Charlie," Everyone chorused their approval as they downed their own champagne before getting up ready to clear the table.

"Leave the dishes!" Alan declared happily as he pointed to the living room excitedly. "It's present time!"

"Ian?" Charlie asked confused as Ian slowly tried to slip out of the front door. "Where are you going?"

"To get your present," He grinned back mischievously as Charlie made to follow him. "Stay here."

"Why's it in your car?!" Charlie smiled curiously as Ian steered him back into the living room.

"Because your dad told me that you are notorious for looking for presents."

"I am not!" Charlie protested loudly as Don came up from behind and pulled him down by his neck before scrubbing the top of his curly head with his fist.

"Yes you are Chuck! I don't think we've ever gotten a present past you!" Don laughed as Charlie struggled to break free of Don's hold before finally managing to. Plonking himself down on the settee opposite the window and more importantly the glittering Christmas tree, Charlie watched, momentarily distracted, as Robin brought in a huge sack of presents from her and Don.

"You could always tell because he'd never quite get it back in the box right," Alan laughed as he came over and sat down on the arm of the couch next to Charlie and rested a comforting hand on his shoulder.

"They're exaggerating," Charlie told Ian petulantly as Ian came over and crouched down in front of him.

"Just stay there," Ian grinned as he brushed his lip's teasingly against Charlie's pouting mouth before sweeping out of the house.

"Who's first then?" Robin asked from her position next to the tree as she reached down and selected one from the pile. "Ah…Larry! This is from Don and me…we hope you don't already have one!"

"Oh my!" Larry replied amazed as he tore back the paper to reveal a Green Lantern comic book. "Number four…" He replied amazed. "I've needed number four for so long! They're just so rare! Thank you! Thank you! And merry Christmas!"

"Merry Christmas Larry," Robin and Don grinned as they shook hands and hugged Larry respectively before diving back into the sack of presents they had brought with them and pulled one out for Alan.

Watching on from his seat on the settee, Charlie smiled happily to himself as he let the contented air of family fill his heart and warm his soul. It was only when Ollie shouted, "Look," that Charlie noticed the first tiny flakes of snow falling past the window.

"It's snowing!" Charlie shouted excitedly as he rushed to the window and looked out at the little blizzard that had taken root outside.

"Merry Christmas Charlie," Ian grinned as Charlie looked around confused and pointed dumbly at the window.

"It's snowing," Charlie told Ian who was smiling secretively in reply as he held up a sprig of mistletoe and leaned in close for a kiss. "Thank you," Charlie beamed as he sunk into Ian's warm embrace and rested his head contentedly on Ian's strong chest. He didn't know how Ian had pulled it off but it was a fitting ending to a most enjoyable day.

"No," Ian replied as he pulled back enough to look Charlie seriously in the eyes. "Thank _you_ for Christmas."

**The End**

**This fic is dedicated to all of those who serve or have served and their families. Thank you for your strength and your sacrifice. Wherever you are, may God bless you this Christmas. X**

_Can't put links on here but if you have time, there is a video that goes well with my dedication: _

_Go onto the youtube website and either type: watch?v=jg200MLmbXY after the adress or put: Josh Groban's I'll be home for Christmas with soldiers, in the serch box. Thank you, I hope you enjoy. Colby'sGirl19 X_


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